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Update on the J-O Situation

Yeah sorry I haven’t blogged in a few days, but I’ve been busy having a good time, which I’ll post about either today or tomorrow.

J-O has decided that she will do this English As A Foreign Language (called a TOEFL test) and then apply for 5 universities in England for next year. She’ll be applying for different subjects for some universities, as far as I understand. She’ll apply to Southampton, Portsmouth, Solent and others. This means she can apply to good unis to see if she gets in, but also apply to the less good ones just in case, so we can still be together. I previously said I would be willing to wait for her, now she has said that she will wait for me. I said I was worried that she might be ‘missing out on some fun’ if she was waiting for me for a year, but she said that she likes only me and that she isn’t missing out on any fun, she just cannot wait to be studying in England and for us to be together.

I just hope it all goes well over the next year, and that I have the patience to wait. Although it’s not like I’ll get any other girls in that time. I hope she can wait. I trust her.

She Made Me Feel Happy

I’ve been feeling down in the dumps for the last few days, because I felt alone, and that my friends and I weren’t very close. All that changed yesterday when I had a video call with E on Skype.

She was in a good mood, and her happiness was very infectious, as it always is. The funniest bits where when she was making funny expressions, albeit inadvertently. She’s one of those people that have a face that is very amusing pretty much whatever expression she has on her face, it’s the same with J. The other funny thing was when she was listening to music and ‘dancing’, despite the fact she was sitting on her bed – basically it involved funny hand movements. I found it so funny.

The whole day today I was very happy, and it was because of that. I found myself singing (in my head, that is) cheerful songs when I was walking back from the train station after university.

Uni: Now I’m Officially Screwed

Today at university I did (amongst other things) go to the Freshers Fayre, where I hoped I could join some societies and then start to actually, finally, make some friends at uni. Alas, I was wrong. It turned out all societies met on days when I am at work back in Southampton. When I realised this I completely capitulated emotionally. With me staying in Southampton, and my job being there too, there is simply no way I can go to the societies and make friends, and because I’m not in halls but living at home I cannot make friends in halls like everyone else does. I could give up my job, but with little chance of finding a weekend job with the current financial situation, that is simply not possible.

Thanks a lot Labour, you’ve really screwed me over on this one! It’s going to be your fault that I’m going to be without friends at university and also have no prospect of getting a girlfriend there either! I’m going to be a 21 year old virgin by the time I come out of university, and I bet I still won’t have even kissing a girl for the first time in that time either. Thanks a f**king bunch, stupid world!

I Thought I’d Made A Friend…

On Monday at university I got introduced to some lecturers and information about my course, and also met people in my tutor. Typically, we had to do some icebreaker exercises, and I was paired up with a girl, our jobs being to find about about each other and inform the rest of our tutor. We seemed to strike up a bit of a rapport during the exercise and I assumed (somewhere naively) that we could be friends, because obviously in university, because everyone is coming from far away and doesn’t know anyone, it is supposed to be easy to make friends. However, after tutor she buggered off without so much as a ‘goodbye’. Oh well, university is going to be a lonely experience…

Sudden Realisation About University: Dammit!

I have just realised he probably should have done halls at Portsmouth rather than staying here in Southampton and commuting in, in order to make lots of friends at uni. In my current situation I won’t spend enough time actually in Portsmouth to make any friends. People in halls make lots of friends like lightning, whereas I’ll have to wait until proper lessons start and I get involved in socities first, and probably not make anywhere near as many friends as I would have done had I been in halls. I’m so stupid! Oh well, too late now I suppose, I’m just totally screwed…

I won’t spend enough time actually in Portsmouth to make any friend
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