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Posts Tagged ‘J-R’

My Patience Has Run Out

Before, I used to be happy to be patient with a girl. If I liked somebody, I was happy to sit back and let things take their course, by which I mean I would not do anything at all about it and eventually after several months or more likely more, I would finally lose interest and move on to another girl.

No longer.

I now have almost zero patience when it comes to the opposite sex. I can’t really be bothered to be friendly with J-O when she doesn’t care. J-R seems to have lost interest and when I txted her the other day about meeting up, when I didn’t get a response the next day I gave up (and I still haven’t recieved any type of response). I was messaging a girl on OKCupid (just a penpan type thing, this girl lives in Brazil), when she didn’t reply the next day as she had done before, I immediately assumed that was that.

At this stage I just don’t have the patience for girls. They’re not interested in me, and I’ve got little appetite for chasing them. Screw them, I don’t need them, I’ll be fine without them.

Travel Plans Progressing

I posted a few weeks ago about how I want to do a bit of travelling. Well, in my last ever uni seminar the other day, during the break, somebody mentioned that there are cheap coaches to several European cities from London. I mentioned this on my Facebook to see if any of my friends wanted to go. Well, J-R posted a comment saying she’d like to go again (she’s been before) with me and M. I asked if she would be willing to do it with some of my other friends too but she didn’t respond.

Well, today I started talking to J-R on fb chat and I slowly steered the conversation towards discussing it. I asked if she was serious and she said yes. I asked who she wanted to go with and she said M and J-A (M’s boyfriend and one of my best friends). I asked J-R if she wanted to invite her boyfriend and she said:

nah coz he lives in kent
we arnt mega mega close
not like [J-A & M]

So, if this does happen, it will be just me, J-R, who by the sounds of it won’t be with her boyfriend by that time, and M and J-A. i.e. a couple and me and her, two single people. If that doesn’t sound like a trip engineered for something to possibly happen between me and J-R, I dunno what is. Okay, maybe I’m overthinking it. Maybe it’s just innocent. But I can’t help feeling slightly hopeful…

J-R Now Has A Boyfriend

Moving Too Quickly?

Last night I was laying in bed thinking about things, as I tend to do, and I began to think about J-R. Yet when I thought about her I got the impression that my feelings for her were unnaturally strong at this stage. I won’t go into exact details but I imagined saying something to her that was quite strong in feeling. It made me think that perhaps I am going for this girl too soon about J-O. It made me wonder if I can keep a cool head by going quickly to her from J-O. I don’t want this to be some sort of ‘rebound’ relationship, since this is the first chance I’ve had to have a proper relationship. Perhaps I should give it more time. Then again, by the time anything does happen (if it does), then I think I should be properly over J-O. I just hope that I can keep things together, to not get confused and ruin the chances for me to have a proper girlfriend for the first time.

Last Weekend & The New Girl

Last weekend I visited a friend, M, at her uni. On the same weekend, this girl who I’d met before, who is a friend of M’s and who I’ve talked to about relationships (including J-O) before (although only through fb chat), was visiting too. So I thought this might be a good opportunity to get to know her better in person.

We spent most of the time with M and her housemates, who were all a bit geeky, to varying degrees. We spent the early afternoon playing on M’s Xbox and I started drinking a bit before everyone else. Eventually we all headed to a pub, where we had dinner and each bought a round of two mixer jugs (as it was a Wetherspoons and they do a deal on that). This was when my level of drunkness peaked and, if I’m honest, I was concentrating on drinking more than interacting with everyone else (which, if anything, thinking about it, is just an excuse to be shy; I can’t talk because I’m busy drinking).

We left the pub at about 22:30, heading back to their house. When we got there more of M’s friends arrived and we played Mario Kart Wii for several hours. Again I didn’t interact much with the others. Firstly this was because I was concentrating on getting used to the Wii controls (I’ve never used a Wii before), but then everyone started talking about relationships, which I really did not want to talk about, so I stayed silent. Luckily, this was when everyone else’s drunkeness peaked, so they didn’t notice my shyness.

Finally, at about 3am, we began to wrap up Mario Kart and get the sofas ready for me and the girl to sleep on (one each, adjacent to each other). Everyone else said goodnight and we settled in for (what was left of) the night. Given my lack of interaction for the entire day with everyone, but especially with this girl (who I kinda like, if you didn’t already guess, though my Twitter followers may know already), I expected that we’d just go straight to sleep.

This didn’t happen, though. Instead, she decided to talk about M’s relationship problems, which I won’t go into. Then she began to discuss the day. She said how she liked M’s flatmates, that they seem really nice, that it’s a shame all but one of them be moving away next year (they are all second years but are moving for some reason I can’t remember). Then we moved onto discussing relationships, the topic being introduced by her via asked how me and J-O are doing. I said to her how I was trying to move on but that I didn’t think I would find anybody else soon. Then she started talking about her relationship, specifically her last one. She said that she wasn’t sure about starting a relationship at her uni or back here, since both would involve distance that she said she is keen to avoid, as her last relationship (which ended badly), was distance-based. I said that it is understandable. Then she said that she prefers to be friends first with guys, before going out with them. Immediately after she said that, she said she considered me to be a friend (which sounded suggestive to my mind, but might not actually be). She also said, a few minutes later I think, that her ideal guy would be a mix between the me and the 3 guys in the house. I pointed out that this was a strange ideal guy, based as it is on quite geeky people, though I can’t remember what was her response to this. She then said that I seemed quite quiet, perhaps because I was sobering up, and I agreed this probably was the cause, though I also said that it was also because they’d all started discussing relationships, which I didn’t want to talk about. She said ‘yeah, I think we peaked at different times, you were going down [in drunkeness] while I was still going up’. I’m not sure if that is significant in any way but it felt it at the time. She also suggested we visit M more often, and she said it would be good if I went at the same time as her because she ‘prefer[s] going with somebody else’ when visiting friends. I said that it sounded like a good idea (ok, that is probably just friendly but it does show she does want to spend time with me, for whatever reason).

So yeah, that was pretty much it. It was a mixed bag really, if looked at positively, or perhaps just friendly if looked at neutrally or negatively. I dunno. Maybe something will happen; maybe it won’t. It would be nice to have another friend at least. Interestingly, in the time since the weekend, I’ve found that her and J-O take up about the same amount of my thoughts. In a way I hope that it swings towards the former rather than the latter. Okay, the former isn’t exactly positive, but it’s better than dwelling on J-O; anything that’ll help me move on is good.

From now on this new girl I like will be referred to as J-R (I know it’s similar to J-O but it just makes it so much easier, for a reason I won’t disclose, but you might be able to guess). I doubt there will be many posts about her for now, but it may increase if (and I say if) anything happens. Which it probably won’t. But it’s nice to hope…

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