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The Grad Ball

Well, I got back from Portsmouth a few hours ago after staying in my friend’s hotel room for the night, although I didn’t get much sleep because of his snoring.

The Grad Ball was a decidedly mixed affair. On the one hand I enjoyed the meal I had with my friend and his housemates at Pizza Express beforehand, and at the Ball itself I enjoyed  ‘silent disco’ they had going – we spent several hours in there. Unfortunately, the rest of it was kind of rubbish. The club bit was fun kinda fun when they were just playing music, but when the band came on we all found it uncomfortably loud – I myself found it rather unpleasant, so we soon left for the silent disco. This night was made worse by the fact it took about 15 – 20 mins to queue to buy a drink, so me and my friends soon gave up trying to drink – I only had 4 drinks in the 5 hours (we arrived at 9pm and left at 2am, when it had started at 7pm and ended at 3am, and the ‘after party’ went on until 5am) we were there, and that I started to feel a bit unwell after an hour or so, for unknown reasons. I can’t say it would have been any better if J-O was there or if I’d been able to have more drinks though. Overall, the time we spent in the club and the silent disco was fun, but for the rest of the time I felt a fair bit like I did at my secondary school prom – different, alone while surrounded by either (a) couples, (b) confident guys or (b) confident and good-looking girls.

To be honest I’m surprised I expected anything more from the evening. I know what I’m like, I should have seen it would have been like this…

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Less Than 1 Week Until Grad Ball…

It’s less than 1 week until my university’s Graduation Ball and I still have no idea if J-O will be coming. I sent her a message last weekend (7th) reminding her that it was in two week’s time, to which she didn’t respond. Although it was not a message that was worded in a way that required a response, it would be nice if she’d acknowledged it, as her ignoring things usually means no. But as I say, the message didn’t require a response, so I hope it’s not an indication that she’s backing out. I tried to chat to her on Thursday, just generally; she did respond initially, but then stopped, although I think fb chat was having problems that day. So, basically, with less than a week to go I still have no idea if she’s coming or not.

She’s been back in the UK almost 3 weeks now but I’ve not talked to her much, because I don’t want to get on her nerves. I’m hoping that my lack of contact will not be interpreted negatively, as used to be a problem. Usually these days she views lack of contact a good thing, as it shows I only like her as a friend, so I hope she’ll take it that way (although you never can tell with her). The plan is that I will send her a message tomorrow saying that we should arrange a time to talk about the Grad Ball in the next few days. If she ignores it, I know where I stand; if she does arrange a chat, I will still be very skeptical, but it will be overall taken as a positive indication.

Overall, I’m 99% sure she’ll say she can’t come, for some reason or another, if true or not. Basically, I can’t trust a word she says any more. I think it’s a good thing. At least this way I’m not disappointed when she inevitably says she ‘can’t come’. To be honest, I’m not even sure I want her there – I’m not sure how I’d feel seeing her for the first time in 6 months, especially as she’ll be all dressed-up. If she does come, I better not drink too much because I am likely to get ‘over-friendly’ if so. I just wish I knew if she was coming, and that I’d feel ok about it…

Finished Uni!

Tutu

It’s official. I’ve finally finished uni. I had no exams, all my essays have been handed in, all books returned and any outstanding fines are paid. Now I’m just waiting for my result – which is looking kinda shaky, I may end up with a Desmond.  But there’s nothing I can do about it now. I shall be spending the next month or so until my graduation relaxing and searching for graduate jobs. I may not end up with a proper graduate job, I may have to get an ordinary job just to tie me over for a while.

The summer might be ok apart from that. I’m going to see Tenacious D in London next week and I shall be going to Amsterdam with a few friends at the end of August. Also, something might be happening between me and that J-R girl (but then it might not).

I’m not sure what I’m going to do with this blog once I’ve graduated. I’ll probably stop using it, since it was supposed to only be about my teenage years (hence my username) but got extended to include my uni years. I’m not sure if I’ll start another one right away, as I doubt I’ll have anything much to talk about for a while. If I did do another blog, I have no idea what I’d call it. If I do start another blog in the next year or so though I will be sure to post it here (if it’s anonymous).

Anyway, I’ll probably have a few posts between now and graduation, so see you all around 🙂

Getting Restless

Over the last few weeks I’ve changed somewhat. Beforehand, I’d envisioned staying in Southampton my whole life, because I love this city and couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. But recently I realised that staying here is only holding me back – for me to make a better life for myself I need to get away, get out of my comfort zone. I also realised that I want to go into something to do with government or politics, and for that I need to look towards London. I just feel that my life is going nowhere stuck here, that I need to branch out, to move, to take charge of my own life, in order to progress. In pursuit of this I’ve applied for several jobs in London. I have no idea if I’ll get them. In fact, I’m feeling rather pessimistic about it.

All I know is, I have to do something and, if I can’t get a job there and move right away, I have to do it within the next few years. I just can’t stand staying at home, staying in this city of limited opportunities; it is holding me back.

Thinking About Jobs

Recently I realised that my time at uni is swiftly drawing to a close and I will need to being looking and thinking about jobs right now. One thing I’ve been thinking about in the last few years is entering the Civil Service. The only trouble is that currently there is a recruitment freeze, with the only way to get in to the Civil Service being the Fast Track scheme for graduates. Looking at it a few days ago I was shocked to discover that the deadline for applying for next year is at the end of November. I began looking on the internet to see what it was all about and discovered that in 2008 there were 22,000 applications for the 500 places on the scheme. I’d dread to think what that number is now.

It’s also quite daunting to read about. As it’s a scheme for “future leaders of the civil service”, you are posted to several different departments over a number of years then thrown fairly quickly (by most standards, by govt standards especially) into management. Thinking about me, somebody who is just coming out of university, with no relevant experience, to be thrown headfirst into something like that is crazy. Not that I’d get onto it at this stage. The only thing working in my favour (well, in only one sense) is that the tests for the opportunity for an interview (which is basically what the initial online tests are) is based on competency rather than experience. I say in only one sense because I have no experience, but at the same time I don’t know if I’m going to be any good at the competency tests. If there are any that involve maths, I’m screwed.

Even if I do pass these online tests, I doubt I’d get any further. They’d take one look at me, a fresh-faced uni graduate with no experience, not even involvement in running a uni society on my CV, and say “next!”. So, I am thinking about doing some unpaid internship work with a local MP. Sure, it’s not exactly great work, in a constituency office (since I doubt there’s any chance of getting anywhere near Westminster) with no idea what work you’ll be trusted with, outside making tea and stuffing envelopes, but it’s a start.

Although, saying that (the not-getting-anywhere-near-Westminster bit), my mum’s friend’s son has said that he knows a Lord that is in need of an intern. I’ve said that I’m interested but would like to know what sort of work I’ll be doing. The thing is, I can’t imagine that Lords need many staff. Most of them only turn up a few times a year, vote on something, maybe debate a bit, then leave. They certainly don’t have constituencies, or being a minister (usually; there are one or two Lords that have govt jobs I believe) to worry about. He could be a Lord that sits on a Committee, which would need some extra work and so maybe a few staff, but surly those would be permanent staff, paid by the House? I can’t see Lords needing their own staff to do that work. Anyway, who knows. It might actually be interesting, useful. Certainly it would be nice to get a taste of the real Houses of Parliament, even if I would be dealing with Lords, the less interesting people (certainly compared to MPs).

Who knows what will happen. Certainly if nothing comes of these things I will have no idea what the hell I’m going to do for a job that would actually give me the sort of experience that might help me get into the Civil Service another year (the Fast Stream scheme not just being for graduates straight out of uni). Certainly if nothing comes of it then I will have no reason, I should think, to move to London  and have another shot with J-O…

Quite Interesting – Munich’s Oktoberfest

The other day, I told you about something interesting I discovered on QI. Well, that episode also brought something else to my attention – Oktoberfest. Now, obviously, I’d heard of it before, but it never occurred to me before to actually go. Well, QI mentioning it made me think me and my friends should go. I posted it on Facebook, and all my friends agreed it was the ‘best idea ever’. Then I started seriously considering it. I thought about doing it this year but we already have another group outing planned in the summer so I thought we’d do it next year, as a graduation treat.

I later discovered we couldn’t have gone this year anyway, since it’s already sold out (as in the only places to stay left are expensive hotels and the best tents are booked up). Apparently, it’s best to book no later than January to get the cheapest hotels/best tents. After looking it up on blogs and stuff, I think I’ve got a good guide together (which I will post in another post for anybody that fancies going). The only trouble with it is that if we have to book before January, nobody is going to know what they’ll be doing in 10/9 months time, especially since most of them will be out of uni and into the ‘real world’ by then. Hopefully I’ll be able to convince them to commit by saying, basically, that this is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, and we just have to pledge that we will go, even though we don’t know what we’ll be doing at that point. I only hope that argument works because, if not, then we won’t be able to go.

Here’s fingers crossed to when I have to do that!

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