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My Ideal Christmas Break J-O Visit

As you know, if you’re a regular reader, it’s likely that I will be visiting J-O in London sometime between Christmas and New Year (her Christmas card I got today said “before New Year’s Eve). While I was at work today I decided what I’m going to say to her when we discuss me visiting her (which I’ll write below, then go on to say what the ideal visit would consist of).

I’ll start off by asking if she’d hear my idea first before she says what she would like. I know she doesn’t like not being in control but I’m hoping that on the spur of the moment she’ll concede on this point, giving me the advantage. I’ll say: “I thought I could come over on Wednesday and stay for three nights until Saturday (New Year’s Eve). Then, on New Year’s Eve, I can either go home in the morning” (I can’t stay because her roommate will be coming back for that night) “or I can pop back to Southampton, deposit my stuff and get changed, then go back for the evening” (this will be a good argument because I think she might not want her roommate to know I stayed, and also makes sense for what I’ll say next). “I know I cannot stay but since the last two trains back are at 2:35 and 4:05 I can stay until past midnight, and we can see in the new year together with your friends.”

I’ll also then say: “Now, I know you may have a few problems with my idea, but before you say what you think of it, I’d like to say a few things about any problems you may have. Firstly, I know it’s a long time to stay and you will need some time to work on your essays, but I have essays to do too, and so I thought that I can bring my laptop and some books and so when you want to work, we can work together and not distract each other. Secondly, I know that when we slept together I tried some things you weren’t comfortable with, but I promise it won’t happen again. I’m also perfectly happy with sleeping on your roommate’s bed if you want. Also, if you unexpectedly get a call from a friends asking if you want to go out for a few hours, and don’t want me to come, I’m fine with going off and doing my own thing. Lastly, you don’t have to worry about any food or anything for me, I will sort all that out myself.”

Now I know what you’re going to say about that, that it’s ridiculous and letting her walk all over me, but the way I see it is that most of those point will just reassure her that I will not interfere with her life too much while I am there; I don’t think she’ll take me up on any of those points. As for New Year’s Eve, I don’t mind going home because a friend might be holding a party that day anyway, so I can go to that.

Now, onto my ideal visit. Ideally, obviously, I’d like to be able to stay from Wednesday to Saturday (I’ve already got Friday off work just in case), and spend New Year with her and her friends, getting the 2:35 or 4:00 train back (because hopefully we might go out somewhere after watching the midnight fireworks, maybe), as I just said. As for what we’d actually do, we’ve already discussed going ice skating. I’d like to take her to Richmond Park (which I’d only heard of after that whole Fenton thing) to see the deer. I’d like for us to visit a restaurant at least one night. I’d like to make love with her one night but I think it’s unlikely (though I’ll bring condoms just in case; when we slept together she did say she still wanted to make love with me, even though we didn’t for various reasons) I’m not sure what else really. But it’s a good start, and if I don’t stay there that long, probably enough.

Hope I haven’t bored you with the very long post. I think this will probably be the last post until the start of the new year (unless I am successful with my plan, in which case I’ll post the news on here – probably by Monday evening I’ll know). If so, I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

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A Quick J-O Situation Update

I decided not to try and see if J-O wanted to meet up today so I could give her the Christmas present I got her. In the last week I’ve called her several times to see how she is, especially after her roommate left the other day. They’ve been pretty nice, though several times it seems like she wasn’t really listening to what I was saying, as a few times something came up which I’d already discussed with her in previous calls. That’s not a good sign. Though having said that she was quite responsive to my texts last night (I went out and at one point near the end of the night I started texting her), though having said that, it was probably out of boredom rather than caring about me in any way. She does seem to want to meet up with me over the Christmas break though, although the notably didn’t say anything when I mentioned that I’d like to stay for a few days; she said we’d “discuss it nearer the time”. Her mum goes back on Monday so I’ll probably call her then (I won’t call while her mum’s there to give them space alone together), and then again on Thursday where I’ll discuss it if we haven’t already. What I’m hoping is that I’ll be able to stay over from Wednesday (28th) until the 31st. She says her roommate is coming back for New Year’s Eve so I imagine I wouldn’t be able to stay then, and I’m not even sure she’d want me to be there at all that day (I get the sense that she’s embarrassed of me; maybe she doesn’t want to be seen together in case any guy she likes notices and thinks we are a couple, even though I made sure I acted like just a friend to her on the one time I did go over properly and meet her friends, and would do so again).

Okay, so not a quick update. But that’s the situation now anyway. I must say reading it back that I can’t believe how pessimistic and cynical I’ve become on this subject, always assuming the worst motive for every action. It’s depressing how depressed I am about this – if that makes sense…

Christmas Won’t Be The Same Without Her

Last night as I was trying to get to sleep, I was thinking about Christmas. I was looking forward to seeing all my friends and family. That triggered in my mind memories of previous Christmas’, of our family all seated round our table, eating, drinking, chatting. Then I remembered my auntie, the one who recently passed away; how she was always a key player in the atmosphere of Christmas dinner, always talking about things, memories, e.t.c. with Mum and Nan. Then I started crying. It’s not going to be the same without her. It’s not fair. She should still be here now, eagerly awaiting spending Christmas with us as she always was. She always loved being around family. But now she can’t be with us any more. At least she and my step-grandad will be enjoying a nice Christmas together in heaven.

Categories: Life, Personal, Thoughts Tags: , ,

A Setback

There has been a bit of a set-back in the long-running J-O saga. She got the results of her English test yesterday and she didn’t get as high a mark as she wanted. She has decided to take the test again, and that will be in about a month or so. That means that she will not come over to Britain before Christmas or New Year. I am kind of sad because I was hoping she’d be here by Christmas, so I could see her a lot over the Christmas holiday and invite her down to Southampton to see my friends when we meet up over Christmas or New Year, before everyone goes back to their unis.

I just hope that my relationship with her does not make her more anxious about getting a good score and coming to London as soon as possible, to rush her, to put pressure on her. I know she loves me, and sees our relationship as a very good thing, I wonder if she might have been better off without me, as she would be under less pressure probably. I would hate to have done that to her.

My Christmas Haul

I’m 18 but my parents have decided that they’re still going to buy me presents. This is what I got:

Coby DP700 7" Digital Photo Frame

A DP 300 digital photo frame.I’ve really wanted one of these for ages but up until now they’ve been too expensive. Then, on the run up to Christmas I saw this one really cheap at Play.com (I love that site) and I thought “I have to put this on my list”. Lo and behold, I got it! I (more or less) instantly filled it with lots of lovely pictures of me and my friends, and I absolutely love it – just plug it in and away it goes, displaying all the nice pictures. I fired it up for five minutes one night, which was a mistake, as I found that I miss them all terribly. I really am too close to my friends, I think I have a problem. Well, another problem to the ever-growing list, at least.

Another thing I got was Chuck Season 1 and Season 2 on DVD. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s about this nerdy guy who gets a load of government secrets into his brain with no way of getting them out, so has to be protected by two secret agent ‘handlers’, Casey (Adam Baldwin) and Sarah (Yvonne Strahovski). More interesting to me (kinda why I like the show) is Chuck’s relationship with Sarah. It’s slowly revealed that they both like each other, but Sarah can’t really admit it because she has to protect Chuck and is a spy so naturally does not want Chuck to know anything about her, even though she does really like him. Again, I like it because it’s the whole nerd-might-get-the-girl situation that I look up to – if he can get the girl, then perhaps I can do. Then again, he’s a nerd, I’m just a geek, so not really that good a comparison (Nerd = clever and likes sci-fi, fantasy, e.t.c. Geek = second bit without the first bit i.e cleverness, see here). But anyway – yeah, I want to be the geek who gets the girl.
(I reckon in my life though that I know the ending. It certainly won’t be me getting the girl.)

I also got Star Trek on Blu-ray, The Hangover on DVD and Guitar Hero: Greatest Hits. Oh yeah, and lots of chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate. But I’ve already eaten most of it. Pretty good haul, all in all. Now to spend money to buy what I didn’t get, that I wanted, in the post-Christmas sales. Yay! I’m going to buy Wipeout HD: Fury and Motorstorm: Arctic Edge I think. Well, Wipeout at least.

Stay tuned for more (hopefully) interesting posts from me in the coming days, weeks, and months. Have a good new year, although I’m sure I’ll post something before then. Got to do my uni essay this week as well, blast it. Oh well, life goes on…

Snow (Or Lack Thereof) and the British

Hey look, it’s a blog post that isn’t about how depressed I am! Joy of joys!

If you are a member of Twitter then you may well have seen the hashtag #uksnow. Yes, that’s right – it snowed in the UK for once! It was amazing how suddenly a tiny bit on snow caused Twitter to go haywire, with #uksnow hitting around 5th or 4th in the top trending topics for a few hours. That’s what us Brits are like – obsessed with the weather – but even more obsessed with snow! Every year we wish for it to snow properly – but it rarely happens. It did early this year, in February, I think, and it was awesome. Today (where I was at least) it hardly snowed at all, and only for about an hour. But in that hour, I dared to hope – dare to hope it would snow properly, and lay!

Alas, it did not happen. But I hope, at some point in the coming month or so, that it does. It would be awesome!

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