I’m Messed Up

I’m a very messed up person. I’m not sure if it’s a guy thing, or just me, but sometimes by brain thinks of stuff I don’t want it t0, or wouldn’t even think of thinking usually. I dunno. I suppose a psychiatrist would say it’s what I really think, subconsciously, that you don’t expect to actually come out into your concious thoughts. I think it might be that, but it might also be a symptom of my over-analysis of my own thoughts – I think I shouldn’t think something, and by thinking that I shouldn’t think about it, it makes me think about it. I don’t want to give you an example of what I’m talking about, because it’s kinda freaky (in my view at least) but I would say it involves me thinking of a female friend in a sexual way, accidentally, when (as you may know if you’ve been reading this blog for a while) this goes entirely against my principles. I dunno what it’s all about – I’m just really messed up, I guess…

  1. 03/11/2009 at 8:41 pm

    It’s as human thing I think. I’d never tell anyone I actually knew this, but I think of all my male friends in that way too. I’d never do anything about it because I only want it to stay in my mind. I’m sure everybody does it – least I’d like to think so.

  2. puregreenjade
    16/11/2009 at 5:49 am

    You’re not messed up, you’re normal^^ Everyone has fantasies… it’s a form of escapism or just living out your desires within the safe confines of your head… as long as it’s not obsessive or interferes with your normal activities, I don’t see why it’s a bad thing.

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