Archive for January, 2009


Today I got random, unexpected thoughts that I really wanted to experience my first kiss. I am annoyed by my own sexual frustration but I have absolutly no power to resolve it. It won’t be resolved in the near future either, unless I take part in spin the bottle at the next party. But I still think it’s weird to kiss your friends and so probably won’t. Also, my tendancy towards obsession might surface if that happens so it’s not a good idea, probably.


A Friend’s Birthday Party


What Really Grinds My Gears

What Really Grinds My Gears

Do you know what really grinds my gears? Friends who say they’ll invite you to their birthday party when they really plan to try and hide it from you when the time comes, yet not trying to hide the fact after the event.

I woulndn’t have gone if he’d invited me anyway because his parties are always to gimmiky, but it’s still a blow to me. Now I’ve decided not to be friends anymore. I’ve had my doubts about our friendship for ages, but this was the final straw. He doesn’t go to the same college as me, so it hardly matters. However, it does make me unbelieveably angry. I’m almost shaking with anger, in fact. But it can’t be helped, so I’ll shrug it off and get on with life.

Love Leads To Sadness

Me and one of my friends were talking the other day and we came to the conclusion that most of the time, love only leads to anger, sadness or resentment, or all three, albeit not all at the same time. Only very rarly does it work out happily. It may not be a nice reality, but it’s true.

Categories: Girls, Life, Relationships, Thoughts

Never Look On The Girls Side Of Life

The other day I got thinking – wouldn’t life be so much better without the sexual side of life? Back when we were kids, life was so much simplier. Girls were seen and treated the same as boys pretty much, and you didn’t have to worry about if someone likes you, because if they did they’d talk to you and if they didn’t, they wouldn’t, and of course that was the only way they’d like you, not the less-obvious sexual side. It sounds weird over-analysing it like this, but it’s true.


Getting to sleep is annoying. Getting to sleep takes a long time. 75% of the time it’s because I can’t stop thinking about stuff, normally girls/relationships-related. 50% of that is going over stuff I’ve already thought about before, as well. It’s so annoying, I can’t stand it. I wish I could stop thinking about this stuff, life would be so much better.

University Will Be Hell

Like I said, university isn’t kind to shy people. I’m a shy person, and I can tell university will be hell if I don’t go to the same one as at least one of my friends.

I don’t do making friends. If I do, it’s because the person approaches me or if they’re friends with one of my friends. University will be depressing becuase I’ll be all alone in a strange world with strange unknown people. I’ll remain alone for 3 years.

It’ll be hell.

University Stereotype

Universities seem to think that everyone is the most outgoing person in the history of the universe. Everything’s about the ‘great social life’ and ‘meeting new people’. According to them, everyone doesn’t mind going up to strangers and immediatly talking to them about any old thing that pops into your head.

What about the shy people? They’re forced to push this shyness away, whatever the cost, which not everyone can do. They are told ‘go out there, or get out!’. It makes me sick.

Not everyone is confident and outgoing, but universities just don’t seem to realise.

Categories: Friendship, Life, Thoughts
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